4 tips for divorcing a narcissist

On Behalf of | Aug 2, 2017 | Divorce

Though in the beginning you may have overlooked many flaws in your spouse due to the love you felt, that willingness to let issues go may have waned over time. In fact, you may have come to the unfortunate realization that you married a narcissist. Your situation may prove even more difficult if this realization came about due to enduring extensive emotional or physical abuse due to his or her selfish tendencies.

At this point, you undoubtedly know that you have options for escaping such an unhealthy relationship. Though you may want to end the marriage in order to move on with your life, the idea of going through divorce can seem daunting as well. You may wish to consider the following tips to feel more at ease with your decision.

Know you are not at fault

The likelihood exists that you have a generally passive and kind nature as a person. Narcissists tend to target individuals with these personality traits because they seem easier to manipulate. Though you may then feel that your situation has come about due to some fault of your own, you may wish to remember that spotting a narcissist can prove difficult. Your spouse may have seemed charming and charismatic only to show his or her true colors later on.

Own your self-worth

Narcissists have a tendency to make everything about themselves, and in doing so, you may have suffered. Your spouse may have taken steps to make you feel badly about yourself in hopes of bolstering his or her view of him or herself. You may face a difficult time understanding that those actions do not indicate your true worth, but once you accept that he or she does not control your self-worth, you may gain more power than expected.


After going through the divorce proceedings and ending the toxic relationship, your ex-spouse may attempt to continue some form of contact in hopes of maintaining a sense of control over you. In order to avoid such a problem, you likely will want to completely disengage from the person. If you have children and cannot completely sever contact, you may wish to keep interactions as short as possible and focus only on topics relating to the kids.

Prepare for legal proceedings

Though you know that ending the relationship is probably the best step for the circumstances, you likely also know that divorce proceedings may prove difficult if your spouse makes the process more contentious than necessary. In order to deal with your case effectively, you may want to gain information on your options and prepare for what lies ahead.


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